I recently worked with a birthmom named Kathy who had been feeling tremendous guilt over her son, and was feeling responsible for a difficult period that he was going through. She just knew that it was all her fault.
Using the Inner Theater technique in conjunction with EFT, I had her start to build a mental image of that guilt. I asked her to tell me about the guilt..what color was it?…what shape was it?…what size was it? Her immediate response was that the guilt was a big, black ball in her stomach and lower abdomen. It was covered with dents, as though it had been punched around quite a bit.
I now asked her to describe the physical sensations associated with that guilt. Where in her body was she feeling it? What were the physical sensations? How intense was the emotion associated with the guilt?
Kathy told me that she felt pain in her stomach and lower abdomen, her breathing was constricted, and her whole body felt tight and tense. She felt a bit nauseated, and became very emotional as we talked. I asked for the level of her emotional charge, on a scale of zero to 10, with 10 being extreme emotion, and zero being none. She reported her emotional charge to be around an 8.
We started tapping.
“Even though I have this big, black ball of guilt in my stomach and abdomen, and it really hurts, I deeply and completely love and accept myself, and I’m open to getting rid of this guilt”.
“Even though I was only a teenager when my son was born, I know that all the pain he’s going through is my fault, and I just can’t handle all that guilt”.
“Even though part of me thinks that I deserve to feel bad, and I’m not about to let go of that guilt, because I’m just that stubborn, I deeply and completely love and accept myself, and I hold myself in kindness and compassion.”
When I next checked in with Kathy, she related that what had happened leading up to the birth of her son was ugly and painful, and that she had hurt everyone. Her emotional charge at that point was 4, so we were making progress.
I asked whether she noticed any change in the black, dented ball of guilt, and she reported that it was becoming more uniform and rounding out, and was no longer black. It now looked newer and cleaner, and was much smaller, with the size and look of a well used baseball. We started tapping again.
“Even though that ball of guilt is getting smaller and rounder and my stomach and abdomen are feeling better, I can still feel the guilt, but I’m open to the possibility that I could get rid of ALL of it, and I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
Now Kathy reported that although her stomach and abdomen were feeling a lot better, her upper arms were really sore and tight. Her emotional charge at this point was a 3, and more tapping brought that down to a 2. We continued to tap.
“Even though I can’t seem to let go of all of the guilt, and I’m holding it in my upper arms, I’m ready to let go of it now, and to bring healing to this issue, and I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
As we tapped, Kathy told me that the ball was getting smaller and harder to see, and finally it disappeared completely!! She had no emotional charge any longer, and was even feeling energized, whereas before the session she was considering a nap.
Whether you’re tapping alone or with someone else, EFT and Inner Theater work amazingly well for highly charged issues such as guilt, fear and anger. Why not give it a try?